The Princess Strikes Back
by LadyOfTheCelticLand
Summary: PostStar WarsBooks: Leia comes home to find Han sleeping, after he's had a looong, and bad, day...when she tries to cheer him up, she discovers a distasteful secret. Luke pranks Leia, and the princess gets revenge...fluffy ficlet! PLEASE R&R!


The Princess Strikes Back

To my Scoundrel, with love

(And the hope that someday, he will learn the meaning of "soap" as well…)

Characters:

Han Solo

Leia Organa (Solo)

Luke Skywalker

Mara Jade (Skywalker)

C3P0

R2D2

A council member

Scene: In a palace, after the war in a time of piece, evening

Notes: All conversations marked by asterisks are Jedi-empowered mind-conversations

Disclaimers: I don't own Star Wars or the books. And a few of the parts in this story are modeled after other authors' splendid works! All in all…oh, just read the story. You'll probably like it…

Leia walked into the room and found Han sleeping on her bed. He had abandoned his uniform for a simple T-shirt and pants. _It isn't time for him to sleep yet!_ she thought with an evil grin. She walked over to him and sat down on the edge of the bed. With a smirk, she started rubbing his neck. It felt hot and tense. Han stiffened, then relaxed as he recognized his wife's touch.

"Bad day?" she asked.

"Yeah…don't even wanna think about it…" he muttered into the pillow.

"Then think about this." She trailed her fingers down over his arms and back up, and over his warm back in teasing designs as wild as the wind. Slowly, she spread herself out beside him, half on him, and slid her cool hand across his burning cheek. Han turned over and gazed at Leia in a way that made her heart race and face flush.

"Oh, enough," she muttered as he continued to just stare at her. Leia pulled his shoulders forward, and placed a searing kiss on his mouth. Immediately, she was swept away in the passion in Han that he hid unless he was alone with her. He rolled over onto her. Leia felt slightly smothered by his weight on her slender body, but enjoyed it all the more. Han took charge of the kiss, and Leia found her hands reaching up to tangle in his hair and pull him down even harder on her.

Then she frowned.

She broke the kiss and said slightly breathlessly,

"Scoundrel, when was the last time you washed your hair?" Han, who was laying hot kisses down her neck, merely shrugged. Leia shuddered and pushed him off. With a smile, she said,

"Come with me." Han followed her into the bathroom, curious. Leia pulled down a bottle of rose-scented shampoo and conditioner. Han's eyes widened with horror.

The screams in their suit caused the whole council, meeting several floors below, to jump about five feet in the air. Then, they relaxed and grinned. Luke was there on business, and didn't know what was going on. He was seriously scared.

_Leia!_ he asked frantically with his mind powers.

_Hello, Dear Brother!_ she answered him cheerfully.

_WHAT IS GOING ON UP THERE! ANOTHER WAR? _

Leia laughed.

_Nothing of the sort! I'm just teaching my darling husband the meanings of 'bath' and 'soap'_ she said serenely. Luke relaxed and chuckled, then lit up with a mischievous light.

Back in the bedroom, Han fell into the bed, grumpy but hair sparkling clean.

"I hope you know how much I love you to let you do something like that to me!" he grumbled. Leia kissed the palm of his hand.

"Show me," she suggested. Some time later, C3P0 opened their door and started to say,

"Master Luke wishes to inquire how Princess Leia is doing--" but didn't get any farther. He stopped, jumped, and shrieked at what he saw. R2D2's screen blushed crimson.

_Luke, that was cruel! _Leia hissed.

_I know, _ he laughed. Leia thought for a moment then gave her reply to the robots. C3P0 and R2D2 went back to Luke.

"Did you get there in time?" the young Jedi asked eagerly.

"Sir, if I had known what I was heading into, I never would have gone!" he replied indignantly. R2D2 spit out a long series of beeps and whistles in agreement. The council roared with laughter. Once they had finished, C3P0 continued. "Anyway, Leia needs more towels. She wishes you to bring them to her. Evidently, Han made quite a mess in a brave but futile attempt to flee the water."

Luke got the towels and went to Leia's room. He raised his hand to knock, when Mara Jade slipped out of the shadows. She wore a thin, green dress, and Luke's eyes widened as he gulped, eyes roaming his wife's barely concealed body.

Mara glided over to him and pulled his mouth to hers in a passionate kiss. When she finished, she stroked his face and short hair.

"How soon are you done work?" she asked in a low voice.

"As soon as I give these towels to Leia," he said, still admiring her.

"You're wrong," she said with amusement flickering in her eyes.

"What? Whaddya mean?" he asked in confusion.

"Those towels aren't for her," she said, wrapping her arms around his neck.

"WHO, then?" Luke asked, trying to ignore her warmth spreading into him.

"You," she whispered, giving him a light peck on the lips.

The council downstairs finished work and was just getting up from their chairs when they heard a second set of yells. They all looked at each other. A wrinkled old man knelt on the ground.

"God, I take back my request for a wife. I TAKE IT BACK! I thank you for blessing me with the life of a solitary hermit!" The other council members shivered and agreed, a few even praising God for not giving them sisters.

_Leia, that was dirty! _ Luke said bitterly.

_So were your mind and mouth. Mara and I thought they should be cleaned out, _she said smugly.

_But—but—that was mean! And there I was, being entranced… _Luke whimpered.

_So what?_ Leia shot back. She turned back to Han. He smirked at her.

"Now, where were we?"

PLEASE REVIEW PPLS! PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE!


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